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Airport escapades- threatened to Tow my car ???

Airport Escapades - night of confusion!

As most families do - I went to the airport to pick up my in-laws. Their flight was arriving at 9:45pm and I expected them to be late. After all, when did any flight arrive on time. But not even two thirds on the way I get a phone call from my in-laws??? Yes, their flight had already landed and they were wondering where we were. So I applied a bit more pressure to the gas pedal and off I went. If the trip wasn’t bad enough with finding no attendee at the toll booth and barley having enough change - the night only got worst.

I went around the airport trying to get to section A and find the jet blue station for arriving flights. Ofcourse just as I found the arriving flight section for jet blue I get a call from my mother in-law telling me she was at the departing section - How? I don’t know. So around the airport I went again to the departing area - get there and I can’t find them. So one more call and my father-in-law tells me they’re in the section where taxi cabs and bus lines pick up people. I tell them [ my fault ] stay where you are I’ll find you - don’t move.

After another turn around the airport I see the section where the taxis and bus liners go and without thinking - I swoop in there trying to get my people out. To my surprise I found an electronic gate that would not open - after discussing it with the person over some speaker - I was told this was a restricted area and that I “should get out” - if I even try to pick up people in this section my car “will be towed” so in the gate, across the lot, out the other side and one more phone call. Meet me upstairs at departure - at the jet blue section number 8 - that’s where I’ll be to get you. One more trip around the airport, into the departure section, and finally picked up the in-laws. Boy - what a night.

Fun Math game - rotting my Brian !!!

Just one more reason that proves how dumb I am - brain hurts, must stop !


I bet you anything you can't solve this!


math game

Fun math game - if you would like to see an online version visit: Fun Math Game

Real Funny Blond Joke

Ok, this happened for real - this is a true story. So all you blondes, please - don't be offended. It's a joke but also a true story. So here we go:

blonde jokeI was working in the store and a sweet blonde older woman walked in. She was excitedly flustered and greeted me with a desperate plea - “can you help me? I don't know what's wrong with my cell phone. it's not working at all.” As I took the phone from her hand to inspect it - she embarrassedly explained how she did everything she could do to make it work... she put it to charge, she checked the battery, she made sure the phone wasn't damaged.... but it did not want to work.

After a minute of playing with it I put it in her hand and said - there you go it's working. She gasp with elation and asked me how did I fix her phone: I quietly told her - I turned it on....

Don’t want to believe me - fine.. But it happened, it is a true story. I felt so bad for her, I didn’t want her to be embarrassed or feel stupid. But hey - we all have a Blonde moment.

blonde jokes

Verizon Freedom !! -- unlimited calling Plan ???

Verizon Freedom

Comprehensive, All-Distance Unlimited Calling Plan

The Verizon Freedom Plan offers residential customers unlimited direct-dialed local, regional and long distance calling, plus the most popular call-management features for one low monthly price.

Verizon Freedom is available in New Jersey, Pennsylvania, New York, Massachusetts, Virginia, Florida, Maryland, and the District of Columbia. It will be launched shortly in West Virginia.
Prices vary by state , and range from $49.95 to $59.95.
Unlimited calling covers all direct-dialed calls from a residential line -- local, regional, long-distance across the U.S., and to Canada and to the U.S. territories.

Verizon Freedom
There are no gimmicks or fine print associated with the unlimited service. Calls are unlimited at any time of the day or night, any day of the week regardless of whether the person on the other end of the line is a Verizon long-distance customer or not.
In addition to unlimited direct-dialed calling, the Verizon Freedom plan offers five call-management features: Home Voice Mail, Caller ID, Call Waiting, Three-Way Calling and Speed Dialing eight.
Verizon Freedom simplifies billing: a single line item covers all relevant package charges and call detail is not provided.

Verizon FiOS Internet –
the only all digital, 100% fiber-optic network straight to your home.

FiOS is the latest in fiber-optic technology. It delivers laser-generated pulses of light, riding on hair-thin strands of glass fiber, all the way to your front door. When FiOS meets your computer, you'll have access to blazing fast speeds. Online gaming, video chatting like it's instant messaging, downloading feature films and CD-quality audio...Do it all faster than ever with FiOS.

Available Speeds

Fast - 5 Mbps download, 2 Mbps upload
Faster - 15 Mbps download, 2 Mbps upload
Faster PLUS - 15 Mbps download, 15 Mbps upload

Go Faster with Verizon High Speed Internet.

Verizon High Speed Internet fires up your existing phone line and turns it into a super-fast Internet connection. Leave the dial-up barrier behind and fly at high speed.

Surf & Talk at the Same Time

Verizon High Speed Internet does both on the same line. Browse the Internet while talking on the phone. Only dial-up users worry about busy signals.

Click here to learn more...


Red neck shirts: how do you dial 911 ?




I should buy my children "Red Neck shirts" - or atleast make my own red neck shirts, you know the t-shirts with the funny not so politically correct red neck jokes.

Really, it must be something in the southern air, maybe the water - or just the area - but how can you be so dumb. Well, let's not say dumb, my kids are not dumb - but sometimes I wonder. my duaghter should have a red neck shirt that says:

" how do you dial 911 ? "

I am no geniuses - just ask my wife. But by God, what are my kids learning in school. I mean, I was talking to my duaghter [ seriouse conversation ] about safty. I told her if you ever get in trouble just call "911" .... she gave me this look and said "how do you dial 911 ..." ??? what ????

Did you just have a red neck moment - are you here or are your brians on vacation? You don't know how to dial 911 - even a red neck knows how to dial 911! You know I could have let it past but it was such a DUH kind of thing.

You, we luagh at my mother in-law becuase in a moment of horror [ house being rob ] her husband [ my father in law ] told her to call 911 - as she screamed back at him " how do you dial 911 ". Now I know she was underrest and couldn't think striaght [ we still luagh about it ] but she has an excuse. But my dughter - well, might as well buy her a red neck shirts that says: "how do you dial 911?"...

Smarter than a Fifth grader - apparently not me....

Are you smarter than a fifth grader?
Apparently I'm not!

My daughter has the "are you smarter than a fifth grader" board game and the Ds video game [ no surprise she plays the video game version more than the board game].

parenting tipsBut my shame lies in the fact that I'm a full grown adult and though I've only watch a few of the game show episodes [ and like many other Americas - have thought to myself - i could do that easy ] I have yet to win one game of "are you smarter than a fifth grader". That's right not one. What a ditz....

To be honest I feel a bit embarrassed to even admit this. It looks so simple and after all - all the question are suppose to be no harder than 5 th grade level questions. Can you imagine my surprise when I get a second grade question wrong... give me a life line please....

Well, I guess I can always tell my kids... I've forgotten more things than you'll ever know... you think it will help??

Obama - to soon to Say: I told you ???

Is it too soon to say - " I told you so "

Do you need money, cash - like now?
Are you depending on Obama and the “new deal” - the promise of a better government to come help you out?

Before - Obama, became president - I had an interesting discussion [ almost heated debate ] about my dislike to Obamas double speak and lies [ yes I said lies ]. I said there is no way he can do want he promises and that his tax cuts [ only tax the rich crap ] was crap and that it would be a tax on people like you and me and the poor. Ofcourse I was shot down accussed of being a Obama hater and all that. So - is it to early to say - “I told you so!” … ?

So much for change - didn’t I tell you Sis that one man can’t do it all - it takes congress to change as well. Oh, and he is already bowing to their whims… All hail bigger Government - here they come to save us…

Please read -
[ Be it noted, all income groups might have to contribute at some point — details to follow: Page 27 of the O-plan observes that "others have proposed different ideas to finance expanded health coverage," including a value-added tax. But there are no specifics on a VAT, only a quick nod to the fact that the $630 billion that Plan Obama sets aside for health care reform "is not sufficient to fully fund comprehensive reform." ]
Plan Obama: pass the check Debra J. Saunders

obama

Getting Old - Get Cancer Insurance ???

Cancer Insurance ? That’s New!
I sell life insurance on the side and I have life insurance - I believe it’s important. I love my children and yes even my wife. I want to believe that they will have a future even if [ God forbid ] I were to unexpectedly die. But when my Doctor mentioned getting my prostate checked in a couple of years because I’m reaching that age when men get prostate cancer - I had to take a double take. Life insurance doesn’t cover cancer???

cancer insuranceThen I read some stuff on Cancer insurance. I remembered what a friend of mine told me about Aflack and how they provided supplemental insurance and yes even had a policy for “cancer insurance". Funny - before today I never really thought about it. That is about "Cancer insurance " - wow just like my car. Maybe I’m just being overly cautious or just realizing I’m not young and yes I am mortal. But first I plan for my kids future with life insurance - now I’m thinking about things like long term illnesses and cancer insurance ???? God I hate getting old.

What is cancer insurance?
Cancer insurance conceptually is very simple. Benefits are paid directly to you regardless of any other insurance you may have. You can then use the benefits to help pay for all of the extra costs associated with your cancer treatment.

Why purchase cancer insurance?
Cancer treatment presents a significant financial burden for almost all patients. Even if the patient has health insurance, there will most likely be deductibles, co-pays, and annual or lifetime caps to pay.

The National Institute of Health estimates the overall costs of cancer in 2007 in the United States was $219.2 billion. Of that, $89.0 billion was due to medical costs and $18.2 billion was due to lost productivity costs.

What are the risks of cancer?
According to the American Cancer Society, it is estimated that 1,437,180 new cancer cases will occur in the United States in 2008. Men have a 1 in 2 chance and women have a 1 in 3 chance of developing cancer.

Cancer risk increases with age. 77% of all cancers occur in individuals age 55 and older.

Cancer is the second leading cause of death in children, after accidents.

Testimonials for cancer insurance:

"Without this coverage I don't know how I would have survived. This has been an expensive illness."
- Betty H.

"The financial support this policy afforded us has, indeed, been a great comfort."
- Janet & Jim P.

"As 27-year-old LS fought the cancer that took her leg and would ultimately take her life, she battled hospital creditors for the home she shared with her husband and their three sons. Bill collectors called the house constantly, demanding $25,700 for an earlier emergency-room visit. She told them, 'No, we can't sell our house because I'm sick with cancer.'"
- Denver Post


Parenting: Things I hate about you

Parenting: Things I hate about you [ wife & kids ]

Parenting is a give and take kind of thing. For all the things your kids give you - love, joy, hope... any real parent knows that there is a lot that parenting takes away from you. So to be fair I thought I would mention some of the things I hate about you [ kids & wife ]. I know parenting deals with kids - but since the significant other is part of the parenting process - I thought I would include her. .... LOL

Stealing Hot Water : As any parent knows getting your kids ready in the morning is a chore - but I hate cold showers and it doesn’t matter if I’m first in the shower or not - some how they find away to steal all of my hot water. If it’s not washing dishes, it’s turning on the washer - it’s always something - I hate cold showers I said.....

Wet Towels: It never seems to amaze me [ it annoys me ] but it’s never a surprise to find that all the towels in the bathroom are wet. Not humid or moist - I mean wet... If I forget to take a dry towel in with me - I can forget enjoying drying myself down - cold, yikes.....

parenting tipsHungry buggerts: Any parent should know that your kids come first. I would go hungry to make sure they had what they needed. But my goodness, these kids act like their starving third world children who haven’t seen real food in weeks. I can’t take out a snack or something without them jumping all over me asking me for some.... Back, get back - it’s my ice cream… back I said. AAAAaaaaaaa....

Public Nudity: As a Parent I know that I have to consider my kids and everything I do around them. But who told my son that it was ok for him to run around in his tidy whitie undies or worse - in the buff. Look kid - put some cloth on, cover that crack I said boy...

Public Domian: Last time I checked - what mine was not yours and whats yours - I bought! So why is it that everyone in my house thinks that anything that belongs to me some how is public domian and anyone can use it. Dog gone it - who took my cup of coffee...????

Privacy : Ok, I am an adult and last time I checked I have rights. But it amazes me that I can’t close the door to my bedroom without someone wanting to come in. And god forgive me if I was wrong in thinking that you knock before coming in... I can’t even go to the bathroom without someone needing to use the bathroom too - hey, we do have two bathrooms in this house.... holy crap man...


The MOM Song


video


Aw this was so cool - The funny thing is that it's all true and it's everything I hear at my house each and every day .. God children drive you crazy...

Thank you,
Rick Demeri. for sharing this....

What were they thinking ??? FUNNY Dancing Boy

video

No, I didn't take this video - just found it in one of my computer file folders. I'm not sure what they were thinking or if my wife just wanted to record my son doing a little jig or something.
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