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Showing posts with the label comedy

Worst Magic trick ever - but funny

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Ever been at work and been so bored that you started looking for anything online to pass the time? Wait, what am I saying - that has to be 90 percent of all the work force in America. So there I was in the Mall Kiosk, late at night and not a single sole except the mall emplyees - who were roaming from store to store talking to each other... UMmmm .. why didn't anyone of them talk to me? Well, that's a defferent story. So back to my story.. I was bored, had no one to talk to [ darn mall employess... hate them... ] and I decided to go online. Not facebook, you need friends in order to enjoy facebook. I post a comment and I am lucky to get a response from anyone in say three to tweenty four hours. Didn't have the time to wait, that is if I even get a response. So I did a Google search for funny jokes - this is one of the ones I really liked... Enjoy.

Real Funny Blond Joke

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Ok, this happened for real - this is a true story. So all you blondes, please - don't be offended. It's a joke but also a true story. So here we go: I was working in the store and a sweet blonde older woman walked in. She was excitedly flustered and greeted me with a desperate plea - “can you help me? I don't know what's wrong with my cell phone. it's not working at all.” As I took the phone from her hand to inspect it - she embarrassedly explained how she did everything she could do to make it work... she put it to charge, she checked the battery, she made sure the phone wasn't damaged.... but it did not want to work. After a minute of playing with it I put it in her hand and said - there you go it's working. She gasp with elation and asked me how did I fix her phone: I quietly told her - I turned it on.... Don’t want to believe me - fine.. But it happened, it is a true story. I felt so bad for her, I didn’t want her to be embarrassed or feel stupid. But he

Oh what happened to my life ????

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I love my life, but just like everyone else there are those days when it is not worth the effort to get out of bed... Today being one of them. My family wanted to go to the fair, then they changed it to movies, not... Then they wanted to go to the fair at 6 pm, ofcourse my duaghter wanted to know if she could invite a friend [ by the way dad can you pay her way ???] I've been awake for less than 4 hours on a saturday morning [ mind you it's my day off ] and I've been bombarded with more work and decission making than when I go to work.... AAAAA!!!...

Wild Christmas party Pt 2

Awe nothing like the holidays and a good old fashion wild Christmas Eve party to get going with the end of the old year and starting the new... You can always tell how your New Years eve party is going to turn out [ good or bad ] by how your Christmas Eve party ends up being. And seeing as how this Christmas Eve party was a wild Hispanic "get down, get down" bash - I expect the New Years Eve party to be a blast... nothing like the holidays..... Party, Party, Party, man I've got to work tommorrow..... grrrr... Oh christmas tree, oh christmas tree, the party was fun but you'll soon be out on the street.... oh christmas tree see you next year at the christmas eve party you'll be.......

Wild Party - Hispanic Christmas Eve

Maybe it was the eggnog, or just the atmosphere of the people around us - but when people celebrate Christmas - hey no one gets down with the spirit like the Hispanic people at this party did. Forget the utile log and caroling - Just take a look at the video below - talk about a wild time at the old Christmas party.... how do you like the dance moves..... Wild Hispanic Christmas Eve Party The christmas party was fun, the dancing was not so bad and there were no alcohol drinking around - too bad I didn't get the competitive bingo contest - watching grown women all excited about playing bingo so they can win some exciting Christmas prizes was the best part of the whole night! Happy Merry Christmas.... Hope your party was as good as this one. I have to get some more pictures out of the camera - that Christmas party and this years holidays festivities gave me alot of stuff to process and maybe some good stuff for the blog.

How do you know your old?

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How do you know your old? that is a good question. Well here are two tips: One - if you have to take time to count the candles - your old.... two - when the room fills with smoke after you blow out the candles, boy you are old!

Unbelievable stories - But all TRUE!!!

Here are some stories I've been saving for when my kids grow up - actual events - funny.... It is very important to always know what to do in case of an emergency. It can save lives to be prepared. While walking down the street one day, my wife mistook the sound of a car back firing for the sound of a gun shot. She immediately went into action. She grabbed my arm and screamed “ everyone, STOP, DROP and Roll !” As a father, I try to teach my children the best way I know how. When my son turned two (2), he and my daughter found it an enjoyable exercise to run wildly around the house. Since my son does everything his sister does, I explained to my little girl that I wanted her to walk, not run in the house. It was a dangerous and unsafe thing to do, that is how people get hurt. If your running you can easily run into something and seriously get hurt. Feeling sure she understood what I was telling her, I turned around and walked straight into the closed glass porch door.... We decide

I was made to love you ???

I was made to love you Ever wonder what you were made to do in life? I figured out a long time ago that I have one very important job, position, duty in life - to love my family. Yes there may be the occasional argument. Yes, they can be a chore and a pain - at times [ too many times ]. They can even cause you to wonder why you even bother - but at the end of the day when you put them to bed and all you can think about is how sweet they are and how you can’t help but smile as you watch them sleep peacefully in their bed... You realize - you were made to love them.

four year old trying to get rid of me??

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Is it me or is my four year old trying to get rid of me?? Here I was happy to have a day off where I could hang out, do as I pleased and in fact - was happy to go and pick up my four year old son from pre-k school. But boy was I in for a surprise. I go and pick him up a half hour earlier than his scheduled time - out of love [ or because I didn’t want to waste the gas driving back and forth - you judge ] and when I signed him out early - he only had one thing to ask of me... Why are you not working??? What, did I hear you right? So I asked him, what do you mean… and he said.. What are you doing home, aren’t you working today?? Hey, come on - can’t a dad get a break… It’s my day off and I want to spend it with you. Why would you want to bring up work and are you trying to get rid of me kid??? Come on, maybe the next time I have a day off I’ll just disappear and not come home - see if you like that one buddy. Life is so strange - and kids their even stranger. Imagine that - a four year o

Breaking the rules for my kids ! ?

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Breaking Manufacturing rules for My kids Safety ? Well, I haven’t been able to write much about the crazy things that happen with my family, I’ve been busy working and my hours are speratic. One day I work mornings the next night - it’s crazy. But I just had to take the time to write this down. You know that everything you buy has a manufacturer guidelines, rules and all that. It’s there to keep you from doing something that would end up hurting you. Well, I broke the rules in order to help my little boy from getting hurt. Really - I broke the rules to protect my child? Well, the thing is my son wants to ride his bike without training wheels - unlike his sister who took several years up to the age of seven or eight to learn how to ride with out training wheels - he wants to be like her, compete with her and wants to learn how to ride his bike without training wheels. Ofcourse he is only four years old and learning will be tough - but my real problem is, I don’t want him to fall down an

Funny Doctor and Spaghetti joke...

I ran across a very funny joke online - you have to read it.... Funny Doctor and Spaghetti joke... A doctor started having an affair with his nurse. A short while later, she told him that she was pregnant. Not wanting his wife to know, he gave the nurse a sum of money and asked her to go to Italy and have the baby there. "But how will I let you know the baby is born?" she asked. He replied, "Just send me a postcard and write "spaghetti" on the back. I'll take care of expenses." Not knowing what else to do, the nurse took the money and flew to Italy. Six months went by, and then one day the doctor's wife called him at the office and said, "Dear, you received a very strange postcard in the mail today from Europe, and I don't understand what it means." The doctor said, "Just wait until I get home and I will explain it to you." Later that evening the doctor came home, read the postcard, and fell to the floor with a heart attack

Life, marraige, kids - is it what you thought?

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Some times I can’t help but wonder- is this really my life? Is this what I really wanted? What about my marriage, my kids - me??? Yeah life throws you some curve balls and your spouse and kids can drive you up the wall….. But then I think of all the laughs, jokes, fun and good times we’ve had and shared - and say … what a waste -- no, just joking. I can’t imagine my life any better with out them. Especially without my boy and girl…life wouldn’t be the same without them. So just incase your having a "need a smile" day - hear is an old marriage joke I revised and turned into art..

Every Morning is a Challenge

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Every Morning is a challenge - but this one was a whole defferent story. Some of you may not know but, I went to venice, Florida for some training and took the family so they could enjoy the beach [ another story I'll share next post - life is so unfair ....]. So, when we came back - trying to get these kids ready for school the next morning was a nightmare. My son, he acted like a wet noodle. I'd pick him up so he could stand and he would just melt and slide down into the bed. My duaghter - well - you can just imagine how she got up. Not a happy camper. In fact my son fell asleep on the way to school - what a twist. So here is some art to enjoy and tell me what you think.

Goodness what is that smell?

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? ? ? Honey what’s that Smell? So here we are watching TV and the kids are doing what they always do [ argue about something trivial ] and this weird smell hits me. It just seemed to fill the air. I didn’t notice it before so I was a bit confused - ofcourse at first I thought someone let one rip [ you know, silent but deadly ]. After much debate [ it was daddy, no mommy, no Isaac, oh that smell...] we soon realized it was coming from that small little creature called general. Our visitor was starting to smell, it’s normal after all he is a dog [ literally ]. So the time came for my wife to give her first "doggy bath". Hey that’s what you have to do if you have a dog. I expected this to be a disaster, a real nightmare - but it turned out to be a mild inconvenience.. The dog was no trouble at all, my wife on the other hand was acting like the dog was a new born baby and she was a first time mother. Can I do this, will this hurt him, is it the right soap... On and on.... it’s

Funny comic - Conquer Earth

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I used to have a boss who apparently only felt comfortable when she made everyone else feel inferior [ dumb ]. It didn't matter what was happening or if she was wrong - as long as she made you look dumb - she was happy. I am so glad I don't work for her any more. That's why I work hard to teach my kids [ especially my daughter ] to value themselves, to feel confident in themselves. Theres nothing wrong with being shy or wrong - but never think less of yourself. Also, it doesn't matter if it's your boss, friend or family, your important and have value... don't let anyone tell you different.

Whats wrong with this ad?

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Putting hillary aside, I decided to surf the net for something new, fresh, interesting and even funny. now while I searched I found an interesting ad online and I want you to tell me what you think is wrong with this ad? Yes, something is wrong - look closely.... Did you see it? Do you get it?

Kerry Pomorolli - live comedy

This is funny and great! It's nice to see some funny clean jokes. I can relate to much of this as I grew up. She just cracks you up. In fact I take the hotel shampoo home with me ??? Lord forgive me!!!! But it brings a thought to mind - do you need a dirty joke inorder to laugh??