What you think does matter

Oh, the internet is filled with so much wonder - but most times I just need a good luagh. So what do I do - I search the image section of Googles extensive search engine to see what i can find. Most often times, I find junk, perversion and what not... The internet is filled with horndogs. But ocassionally I find some very funny images, pics and jokes that I thought I would share with you. After all the internet is a big place and who knows if I will ever find these pics again. So save them I do to past them here [ sound like Yoda from star wars - "save them I do". So take a look, have a luagh and tell me what you think?

A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his pretty blonde neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it then slammed it shut and stormed back into the house. A little later she came out of her house again, went to the mailbox, again opened it, and again slammed it shut. Angrily, back into the house she went.... As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it shut harder than ever.... Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, “Is something wrong?” To which she replied, “There certainly is! My stupid computer keeps saying, ‘YOU’VE GOT MAIL’.”

After camping, I had a new appreciation for wild life. I love camping, nature and the wild. My wife said I got a bit "animalistic" while we were camping. hey - the wild brings out the animal in me. But when I received the above photo in my email box - it gave a whole new meaning to the words " rear ended ".... Yikes!

Here I was looking thru the thousands of pictures I have of my children and I started to notice something weird. You know - one of those odd things only parents do with their children. I don’t know if this was planned [ by my wife ] or if she just subconsciously did it but I found photos of my son sitting on the toilet. Now it might not sound odd at first - but she took one in 2005, took one in 2006 and then another in 2007...? I have a few of the pictures here on the blog - ain't he cute? Now yeah, she was probably proud of my little man and his progress with his “poddy training”... but these pictures are 3 years apart ? Ofcourse these are the kinds of pics we all wish Mom never had - because they most certainly will come out of the closet when we bring our date over to visit.. Boy, I remember the day my Mom brought out some baby pictures of me to show my girlfriend how cute I was as a baby [ never mind I was 3 years old in a crib and sucking a pacifier ] Couldn't she have fou...

If you see this man - don't let him into your kitchen!

A friend and a blog fan made a request for new material.... read more below, below A Friend and a blog fan asked me to try and do [ use ] new material for the blog. She told me just last Wednesday that she checks her email for my "email updates' with a giddy expectation to see whats new on the blog. She says she loves all the jokes, the pictures of the kids and the dog - but she was wondering if I had anything new, defferent. Well, this put a lot of pressure on me to create something new. after all - the blog is about the insanity that is my world - meaning my kids and the spouse. And if I don't want to sleep with the dog, the spouse is off limits.... So after several hours of thinking and thinking - I cracked, I could not perform under this pressure. So I created the above photo gallery slide show for you, yes you Betsy - hope you like it..... it's something new! See you sunday ...

Ever get lost. Too embarrassed to ask for directions? Are you the type that wont take directions? Well I have a funny story for you. When I first married and moved to Florida - before the kids and all that. My wife wanted to take a trip to miami - you know, look at the beach. Now I didn’t want to go and I let it be known, but I went, I even did the driving. We drove over 600 miles that day why. Because when I finally got to the beach in miami, I was still unhappy and again let it be known - so we argued for 5 minutes, looked at the beach for 2 minutes and then got back in the car to drive back home. of course the traffic was bad and I got lost. It took the insisting nagging push of my wife to get me to ask a police officer [ sheriff here in Florida ] for help with directions. Once on the road it was late and my wife doze off. of course again I got [ let say ] confused and took the Florida turnpike [ wrong, really wrong ] I had no idea where I was, how to get off and I was not going to ...

What do you do when your facing down possible hurricane It’s been about three or four years since several Hurricanes came thru our town and brought a stop to the belief that people were safe inland. So when the reports came in that tropical storm “fay” was projected to become a level 1 hurricane - lets just say some people went bonkers. I’m glad it didn’t turn out as bad as it was predicted - but there has been a lot of damage, especially flood damage around all parts of Florida. We did our part to get ready for the storm after that we just had to sit and wait. So what do you do while you wait for the worst and try to keep your family calm? Here is what I did: Watched chicken little movie with family Played black jack with kiki Played uno w/ kiki Played with my son Ate dinner together - early just in case Relaxed as son played in shower and daughter played her DS Played battleship w/ kiki Talk with wife and helped clean up [ she always clean when nervous] Relax as waiting for next “fay...

I used to have a boss who apparently only felt comfortable when she made everyone else feel inferior [ dumb ]. It didn't matter what was happening or if she was wrong - as long as she made you look dumb - she was happy. I am so glad I don't work for her any more. That's why I work hard to teach my kids [ especially my daughter ] to value themselves, to feel confident in themselves. Theres nothing wrong with being shy or wrong - but never think less of yourself. Also, it doesn't matter if it's your boss, friend or family, your important and have value... don't let anyone tell you different.

Funny pictures and my crazy mind. Put the two together and you might find something to laugh at - I hope. Enjoy the 4th installment of funny pictures and my thoughts. Hey wait a minute - I'm not wearing a mask. Passing gas, how cute... [ only a baby ]

I hear people talk about how video games are a bad influence on our children. And I am starting to wonder if they are right. I think my 4 year old son has a problem - atleast with video games. He woke up this morning and asked me one thing - “Can I play now?” Looking at this photo - I'm wondering if he wasn't sleep walking - boy does this kid have it bad for video games.

I couldn't help it. When your bored on a saturday afternoon and you've been left alone and all you have is your internet - funny things happen. Here is my second installment of funny pictures and my thoughts. Well, when your hungry - anything looks good. I didn't say it, I just point out the facts... Sometimes it's best not to get involved.... Someone call the fire department!

By now most of you should already know that my 4 year old son is a wee bit adicted to playing video games. he seems to favor Halo 2 and Tour of Duty. Half the time he doesn't really know what he is doing - but he is getting good at controling the figures, especially in halo 2. My own duaghter tells me that it's not good for him - that "this is why he is always talking about killing Dad". I wouldn't say he talks about killing becuase of the game - more like becuase of sponge bob, tom and jerry, bugs bunny - and maybe a bit of the game. But really have you seen how Daffy Duck gets shot in the face..... The bad thing is how he wants to eat, sleep and live the game. Every waking moment of the day he wants to know when he can play the game - I think he has made an IDOl of the X-box!

Here are some thoughts on these funny and strange photos tell me what you think. Whats so fun about history - mind scared for life! Why ask for Directions honey - who can really help. There are things friends shouldn't do, I don't care how close a friend you are.... Are you sure you want a cat ?

Your foot hurt - do what Doctor tell’s ya ? The things we have to do to get healthier. Apparently the pain of her foot was greater than the heart ache or embarrassment of trying to follow doctors orders. My spouse - who will not be named [ to protect me from getting hurt ] has suffered some foot pain and while I don’t know the proper name or even how to spell what the doctor diagnosed her with - I do know it has to do with the muscle at the arch of her foot [ it goes flat and causes pain and when she relaxes her foot it goes back to it’s correct curve only to be stretched flat once she starts walking…] So what is so funny? oh I don’t know - the doctor wrapped her foot up and she can’t wet the wrap - so this is what she does to avoid getting her foot wet.....

I ran across an old photo - and thought, this would be fun to share. Going to church and learning about God can be a life changing experience - but this, a photo of kiki’s first time ever in a church when she was only a baby - is hilarious. Oh look at that Face !

Help, summer too long - kids are running out of things to do. dad needs help - call "rescue parents" quickly. He might not survive... It's amazing isn't - just because your their parent they expect you to keep them occupied and happy. What, when I was growing up all I had was the television set [ only 12 channels provided not the 150 channels kids get today ] and my brothers and sisters - which meant a lot of fighting... But my kids, no they want me to be active, play with them, keep them entertained - Somebody save me....